On Sunday morning, I had the privilege of spending some time with the Harvesters Church in Ibadan, and ministering in 2 of their services. It was an unexpected opportunity, but it felt very right in my spirit and mind, it was a great way to have spent my Sunday morning as I shared Gods revelation to me about relationships. I felt really blessed by the thoughts myself, and I’m positive that many people received wisdom and instruction to better position themselves.
Relationships are important, they are like Relation- Ships, they are ships that aid you towards a desired destination. Ships like most modes of transportation are useless without clear direction. Those who don’t know where they are going need no road maps, a relationship is a ship that via the opportunity to relate with another mortal, steers you towards your dreams. Friendship for friendships sake is a waste of time. If you don’t know where you are going, every company you keep is a wrong company. The first step in navigating into the right relationship is investing in the clarity of one’s vision. The first question that precedes great relationships is clarity of purpose! Before you begin to join yourself to any chariot, where you are going must first be sure!
Once your destination is clear and your sails are set, things will begin to work in your favor. It doesn’t matter where the wind is coming from or where it is going, the winds will ultimately serve your purpose once your sails are set. The picture of your future triggers a desire in your heart, this desire takes you to the place of prayer, and the moment your desire is expressed to the divine, your responsibility shifts from a mere seeker to someone who operates with ownership. As this becomes your reality, the universe begins to rearrange itself. Information and People begin to seek you to link you up with that which has been made available to you by your request. Relationships are answers to prayers, when your life is on the border of change, two things happen, you come into contact with amazing information, and you encounter new people. The comfort that you need, is with someone who required the same comfort in their own seasons. The clarity of your vision is directly proportional to the accuracy of your relationships.
With a clear vision as a fulfilled prerequisite, it is important to understand the types of relationships that are important to have as one navigates towards ones dreams.
The role of a forerunner is critical, this might be a biological father, mother or relative, or anyone that plays the role of going ahead of you to show you your future. Taking a case study from the life of Joseph, his father gives him a colourful robe representative of royalty and being special. Shortly after receiving this robe, Joseph begins to have dreams. The role of the forerunner is to inspire you and alert you of the greatness that resides in you. Josephs father continued to take note of the small things that Joseph was doing and keeping the records so that in the times when clarity blurs, Joseph has a rich history to lean on. The same type of thing happened with Jesus, this time it was Mary keeping the records. It was this same Mary that got his first miracle out of him. The forerunner is someone placed above you, who loves you deeply and is sensitive enough to sense that your life is not ordinary. These people inspire us.
Yes you read that correctly. Foes or Enemies are required roles in the life of anyone who will be successful. In a story I’m fond of telling, where the king decides to give his daughter’s hand in marriage to the person who demonstrates courage, the guy who finally jumps into the pool filled with crocodiles and successfully swam to the other side and married the daughter claimed one thing. He claimed that he was pushed! No normal person will jump into a pool of fasting crocodiles. The question I like to ask is, who pushed him? Was it his friend or his foe? The foe for sure, friends don’t push you, they hug you :). You want to be successful? You need enemies, you need critics, you need adversaries. Opposing views and criticisms are extremely helpful, even when we shut them down, they affect us. They force us to regularly raise our standards, they motivate us to up our game, they inspire us to look for ways to block the holes that they so shamelessly expose. In the case study of Joseph. He was sold into slavery by his brothers who had become his foes, the Bible says they hated him. They sold him in their eyes into slavery, but God sent him ahead to save the nation of Israel. Would he ever have gotten to Egypt if all his brothers loved him and wanted him around them? No! Where your life is going is far, you need foes to push you along the right path. In the words of Jesus – “Blessed are you when people insult you and persecute you, and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of Me. Rejoice and be glad, for your reward in heaven is great; for in the same way they persecuted the prophets who were before you”. Foes are ultimately push you to purpose. Even in the story of Jesus, Jesus was driven to fulfill his purpose by the devil (his foe), while Peter (his friend) was trying to drag him back. Love those who hate you, and pray for those who despisefully use you!
To forge is to form (metal, for example) by heating in a forge and beating or hammering into shape. Forgers are those people in your life who are neither your friends nor your foes, but have a role to play in your life that involves hammering you into shape. In the period of their reign over your life, if you are not perceptive, you do not like them very much. They are like superiors at work, seniors in school or someone whose authority you are under by not much of your direct choice. They are very demanding and very stressful, but they are forging you into shape and increasing your future market value. They are the family you stay with inbetween transition that force you to be neat, force you to come home early, force you to not be in the wrong relationship. You have a healthy fear for them, and you comply. In the life of Joseph, this was Potiphar. Joseph could dream and interprete dreams, but in Potiphar’s house, Joseph learnt administration. Without Potiphar, Joseph could have gotten to Pharoah’s palace and interpreted the dreams alone. There is a long shot from knowing what to do to knowing how to do it. The skill sets required for being a government critic is different from the skill sets of being an executive governor. Forgers heat and beat you to shape. They are essential in any life heading for greatness.
There are still a few more F’s and a few more relationship watch outs. When use is unknown, abuse is inevitable. I’ll be talking more about this soon, till then. Get clarity about your future, write it down and paint it out. Define your relationships, and let them serve their purpose in your life, and to all my foes out there, may you live long 🙂 May you live long for the scriptures to be fulfilled that say – “you prepared a table before me (a six course meal -msg), in the presence of my enemies”