Why Me?

Have you asked that question lately? This is a question we can ask in thanksgiven, but it’s a question we ask more as a complain and out of finding ourselves in places we think we do not deserve. We ask, “why me?”, “why not someone else?”, “why am I going through this mess?”, “Why?”. It may be frustration at work, an exam you prepared for but failed, the loss of a loved one, financial mishap, struggle with an addiction, loss of any type, health issues, acute fear, marital issues, frustrated dreams or an endless list of possibilities. You look at your life, stare at your situation and muse over your circumstances. You know it’s not a fair question to ask, but it slips out of your mouth anyway. You lift up your head to the skies, you desire to see and meet with God, and the question on your heart is, “Why me?”. I have an answer for you today!

From my personal experience and from keen observation of the stories shared by many others, I have come to one empowering perspective – “The message you were sent to deliver to this world, will be formed in the midst of your mess”. The reason why you are going through what you are going through, is because that area of challenge has a key that a large population of the world is struggling to open. The reason you are in that mess, is because someone needs to get the key, and use the key to set others free. The reason why you are experiencing what you are experiencing, is because before you can help others become free, you need to understand what they are going through and be able to show them the way.

The comfort that you will offer the world, is going to be derived from the comfort you received while going through your challenges. The audience you will reach will be far beyond those going through exactly what you went through, but will extend to those who will derive inspiration from exactly the same type of comfort you received.

I’ll give 2 examples, one from the life of a global celebrity coming out of a “Why Me” situation, and one from my own life to bring it home.

The lyrics below are from Whitney Houston’s latest album. The challenges she had were drugs and a failing marriage, but have a look at the lyrics of the comfort she received.

Lost touch with my soul
I had no where to turn
I had no where to go
Lost sight of my dream,
Thought it would be the end of me
I thought I’d never make it through
I had no hope to hold on to,
I thought I would break

I didn’t know my own strength
And I crashed down, and I tumbled
But I did not crumble
I got through all the pain
I didn’t know my own strength
Survived my darkest hour
My faith kept me alive
I picked myself back up
Hold my head up high
I was not built to break
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I didn’t know my own strength

Found hope in my heart,
I found the light to life
My way out the dark
Found all that I need
Here inside of me
I thought I’d never find my way
I thought I’d never lift that weight
I thought I would break

I didn’t know my own strength
And I crashed down, and I tumbled
But I did not crumble
I got through all the pain
I didn’t know my own strength
Survived my darkest hour
My faith kept me alive
I picked myself back up
Hold my head up high
I was not built to break
I didn’t know my own strength

There were so many times I
Wondered how I’d get through the night I
Thought took all I could take

I didn’t know my own strength
And I crashed down, and I tumbled
But I did not crumble
I got through all the pain
I didn’t know my own strength
Survived my darkest hour
My faith kept me alive
I picked myself back up
Hold my head up high
I was not built to break
I didn’t know my own strength

If you read those lyrics, you’ll see applications to different kinds of people going through any kind of struggle. Struggle with disease, family, frustration, unrealized dreams e.t.c. She was able to connect with millions of women around the world, with an album that become number one in a few weeks from launch. She was able to reach deep down into the comfort that she received, and find comfort for others. Her mess brought out a message, and brought her out to the other side of “why me?” – a place of no regrets!

Personally, I get frequently invited to speak to people about business, about plan B, about living the dream, about leading, empowering others or simply living an inspiring life. Just this last Saturday, I was a keynote speaker in a “Plan B conference”. The message I deliver in all these places is not what I read from books. The message I share, was forged in the crucible of my challenges! My failed attempts at business, my losses of different dimensions, wrong choices I made, my frustrations with business and my quest to go back into paid employment. A candle has to burn before it can give light, the light we share is the result of our burning experiences. The comfort we share, is the one we have received.

“Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, when you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish it’s work, so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.” – James 1:2-5

Wisdom and depth are developed in prolonged trying terms. Quit looking for the short cuts, endure the pains, enjoy the process, and know that what God gives you in that hour of discomfort holds your message to millions and holds your key to abundance.