Yesterday we had a session of our monthly mentorship session. Gbenga Sesan, myself and this time around a guest speaker – Emmanuel Utomi. It was an exciting session for me, because during the session I learnt some vital things as well. I learnt a few questions that make one’s picture of success clearer to one. Three vital questions that if you answer, will help you focus your strengths at being the real person on the inside of you that is craving for expression. I’ll use my own personal template, and I’ll hope that this will be instructive enough to help you formulate yours. There is nothing like climbing the ladder of success to the top of the sky scraper of achievement only to discover it was leaning against the wrong wall.
There are essentially 3 questions you can ask yourself before you start climbing, or if you are climbing already, before you climb too far. You don’t want to labor hard only to find yourself not feeling the excitement you believed that you would if you succeeded. Success means different things to different people. There is the societies definition of success, but the real answers to success for you is on your inside, not on the outside. “It doesn’t make sense to look for what was lost inside on the outside simply because it’s brighter there” – Emmanuel Utomi
1. I want to be successful like…
It will surprise you that 20 people of the same age will answer this one question differently. The answer to this question shows in what line of life and business you want to be successful. Some will answer with 3 sharply contrasting names, and it’s the blend of that that gives each individual it’s uniqueness. Who do you want to be successful like? For me, if I am to pick from people that are currently in visibly around, in the order in which they strike my mind, I’ll go for Oprah Winfrey, Billy Graham and Mandela. I’m sure there are others you expect, and of course I want to be rich like Bill Gates, have many businesses like Richard Branson, be a renown investor like Warren Buffet and more, but in the core of who I want to be successful like, the name that stares me in the eye is Oprah, Billy, Mandela and of course the others. Why? I feel very in tune with Oprah because, she balances very well the roles of providing information, being generous, being a role model and being a billionaire in $$$. She is one of those very rich people that it takes a high IQ to know how she makes so much money. She hasn’t lost touch with the common man, she is league with the high and mighty and she is one of the most powerful people in the world. Who do you want to be successful like? The answer to this question is the first cardinal point in your journey.
2. I feel successful when…
This again is another point of difference for most people. There are different things that make us feel successful. Some of us feel successful when we win an award, some when we strike a major business deal that makes us very rich. Some of us when we become appointed as a leader, and some when our contribution is valued. The list of things that trigger the feeling of success varies, you however need to answer for yours. For me again, I feel successful, when I am useful, I feel successful when I can influence change, I feel successful when I put smiles on peoples faces, I feel successful when some succeeds because of what I did. I feel successful when I hear thank you, well done and God bless you. I feel successful when I know that I am part of your success story. I feel successful when I know that in death I have as much contribution as when alive. I’m successful when I know that my contribution succeeds me.
3. I am successful when I have achieved…
We all have different success symbols, some bestowed on us by society, some original to us. We need to have the ability to separate societal symbols from individual symbols. What are those elements that make you feel successful? Now, this is a function of our paradigm. The experiences, relationships and books that have shaped our thinking. For some people it’s a type of car, a house, a relationship, a job, a title, e.t.c. These are not bad things, they are symbols that if many people had they would feel more successful. For me, it’s slightly different. Symbols of success for me are the ability to need $1,000,000,000 with 1 day notice and get it from people who trust me enough. The ability to be resigned from all my labors by the age of 40 and dedicate my energies to a social course. To be relevant to nations, lend to them, be influential and retain humility. When are you successful?
It’s food for thought, don’t just read and gloss over it, think about it, print it – copyright is the right to copy, as far as it’s copied right (As a Tope Ogunfayo, dear friend of mine will say). We’ll do better as a community if we are all individually successful and better as a nation if as a community we get things right. I look forward to the future with excitement. You will succeed.
