It has been said, that it is not what happens to us that counts, but what we do with what happens to us. It’s also said, that it’s not what we have the counts, it’s what we do with what we have that counts. While these are truths that have the capacity of getting us to sigh and think deeply, I think there are some vital realities lost on us when we consider these statements. I’ll like us to consider some of the elements that defined as happenings and some of the elements classified as “what we have”.
Happennings
Success is not a function of unique good happenings, good things happen to all, it’s more a funtion of how we manage the happenings in our lives. Failure is not the odd collection of unfortunate incidents, it’s how we rise everytime the opportunity to fall presents itself. Here are a few things that have happened to different people, and how the reactions can be the difference between winning and losing.
Good Happenings
1. Opportunities
Interestingly, we all get our share of good opportunities in life. Some of us are prepared for our opporunities and make the most of them, some of us are not. The person that is called lucky is the person who is prepared when his/her opportunity comes. Opportunities come to all, some convert those moments into defining moments and change their lives, some Pass Over Opportunities Repeatedly (POOR) and become poor. What is your positioning relative to opportunities today? Are you passing over opportunities repeatedly? Are you preparing for future opportunities? Are you making the most of your current opportunities? It’s not in the presence or absense of opportunities, it’s the use that counts!
2. Praise
We all get praised at some time or the other for what we did well. Some of allow the praise to usher them to do more, while some allow the praise to get into their heads and make them misbehave. How you respond to praise, to acclaim or to applause goes a long way to determine the difference between success and failure. There is a good way to respond to praise, there is a bad way to respond.
I’m sure you can generate and add to this list.
Bad Happenings
1. Rejection
We all face this one time or the other in our lives. There are those days when it seems that the curtains are removed, and it becomes clear to you, that you might have let some people down, and you face the cold reality of their rejection. There are times when the rejection seems deserved, and there are times when it seems out of place. However you rank the basis for the rejection, one thing is certain, how you handle this time can make you or mar you. If you leave rejection with a resolve to be better, with a resolve to measure yourself by new standards, if you leave rejection with a sense of individuality that does not require the acceptance of the majority to establish it’s personality, then the rejection made you. If you however leave rejection with bitterness, with anger or with any ill feeling, then rejection just marred you.
2. Failure
Failure is not the absence of success, it’s a signpost on the way to success. No matter how successful we are, we have all failed sometimes in our lives. It is not failiure that destroys one’s destiny, it’s how the failure is handled. Some leave failure with a burning resolve to prove a point, some others leave with a new definition of their identity -“Failures”. It’s not how low you fall that counts, its how high you bounce back that matters. If you try, and fail, at least you are forever out of the company of those who know neither success nor failure because they haven’t ever tried.
The list of bad happenings are inexaustible, but there is nothing that you are going through that is uncommon, someone somewhere has been there, and you can benefit from their perspectives. Feel free to add to this list as well.
What we have
The list of the “things we have” are inexaustible. It could be money, it could talent, it could be resources, relationships, fame e.t.c. Everything you have is what you need to begin to plot your future. What you don’t have you don’t need. Someone else can have exactly what you have and make a mess of it, while someone else can have the same thing and live an inspiring life. We all have something, something that we can leverage on and make the best use of. It is not what we have, it’s what we do with what we have that makes the world of differnce.
The question to you today is simple, what are you doing with the things you have and what are you doing about the things that happened to you. Success is not in those things, success is in you. You have the power to take any situation and turn it around for good. What happened to you? Do you have an excuse or do you have a testimony.
21 thoughts on “Reason or Excuse -No Difference”
Like you rightly said, success is within us,and our reaction to things will determine the actions we take, how we react, when we are criticized,applauded,rejected, when we succeed or when we fail, all this will determine what will become of us eventually!
I believe we all have what it takes on the inside of us to succeed,My thots on all you wrote is -prepare for opportunities, so that when it comes, you can grab it and utilize it well,criticism comes with living and making progress, so when it comes, check it out, is it positive or negative, either way, your response to it, will make all the difference,When applauded, you know its an applause to take your game higher, so you can get a standing ovation next time but remember that the glory goes to God, and you too must applaud those that are with you in making things happen,rejection should not come as a surprise as even Jesus Christ was rejected by those he was sent to and the worse form of rejection is self-rejection,so if people reject you, dont reject yourself, move on! fail if you must but dust yourself and begin again!We will all succeed by God’s grace in Jesus name amen!
http://www.bridgetelesinspeaks.blogspot.com
CHAIRMAN,
In summarry we must do what we desire irrespective of the threats or opportunites around us.
” Let is do or die” Burns
Thanks Deolu for this mind-opener.
@ Deolu
If you try, and fail, at least you are forever out of the company of those who know neither success nor failure because they haven’t ever tried.
I couldn’t agree less, failure may be good at times,depending on your perspective, anyway if you must fail please fail forward.
http://www.undergraduatesinbusiness.com
Itis not that we do nont have capacity to succeed, it is just that mmany us have sit down and look approach to life. candid word for a precise time.
Compliments…
‘It is not failure that destroys one’s destiny, it’s how the failure is handled’…the one that sits for an examination will either fail or pass; what about the one that never sat for any?
Make that move / attempt…expect to succeed, but when you fail, see it from an opportunity point of view.
We will get there.
How we define success or failure depends on a lot of factors, but the important thing is that we should succeed a and fail forward. That is, we should always come out of whatever we experience better than we were before the experience. Thanks chairman.
I have a testimony and always will. I have been armed me with what to do.
God bless you.
its not what we dont have that will limit you but what you have and dont use.its not what you dont know that will limit you but what you know and dont make use of!
enough said,2009 is around the corner!
hmmmm,absolutely,absolutely,undisputably true!
Wow, definitely a good post.
I love your blog a lot.
Great content I must say.
True, like what Jack Canfield always says,
Event + Response = Outcome
It is the response that we give that will determine
our future. The very same event can happen to
2 people, but the two can come out with totally
different results.
This is also about developing a responsible mindset.
If you think that you’re responsible and have control
over your life, you’ll achieve much more because
you’re the one who shape your own destiny.
Thanks for such a great post.
Shawn
Success Strategies
These 2 things really define who we currently are, and will become:
i) what we have and have done/will do with it, and
ii) what has happened/will happen to us and what we have done/will do with it
Our perspectives towards these 2 must be right. He that has ears….
Welldone
GREAT POST
Truth! You’ve given us things to ruminate about. It’s really insightful. Thanks
This post is just for me. Thank you Deolu.
Thanks my brother.
success is really sweet. i have tasted it and i know i can gget satisfied of it because there is always a better success. we must never forget just like you rightly pointed out that success is not in ones material possession(emphasis mine), neither is it in our wisdom or giftings but it begins from inside. a state of the mind.many people have allowed the pains and rejections of yesterday to cloud their sight of a wonderful today and a blissful tommorrow. others have allowed inferiority complex, little setbacks and discouragements to allow them fail.
but for me, i wont retire or perspire till my name is written in the annals of history. want to be like my chairman deolu.God bless naija.
almost forgot to say this that whatever your reasons or excuses for failing, its not reasonable enough. even if you had the worst accident in life that makes you think you think that its all over for you;again i say its not reasonable enough.even if you were the product of sexual abuse and rape, its not reasonble enough.lets come out of it and get to where we should be by God’s divine arrangement.God bless our country naija.
Great piece,sir.
it’s not what we have that limits us but what we have but don’t know how to use.
somebody once said that the greatest tragedy that happens to us is not that we die but what dies in us even while we are still alive.
have you tasted success?…you might know how sweet it is until you have tasted failure.
Nigeria must succeed.
Adebisi i agree with you that Nigeria must succeed. the succeess of Nigeria is tied to the success of the individuals in it. if majority of its citizens can be like wealthy, have an enterpreneural mindset, see, seize and maximise opportunity when it comes, there will be a change in the land. it begins from a change of mindset and a determination to succeed inspite of the odds.Nigeria has no choice but to succeed.