Dear Man,
If you wake up to a healthy breakfast from your wife, head to work, she heads to work, and you return to a fresh, hot dinner without ever lifting a plate or doing the laundry, yet somehow have clean clothes to wear and delicious food to eat, let me be the first to tell you: you’re a lamb being prepared for slaughter. Free yourself from this outdated “man of the house” setup before it solidifies. Being a man doesn’t mean exemption from serving, and no, you can’t buy your way out with money alone.
What I’ve described may sound like the ideal life we observed our parents live. Our culture and environment once supported the notion of a man dominating at 40-50, a period filled with energy and financial success. However, during these years, many men miss a crucial opportunity to build genuine connections with their spouses and children. They play the authoritative figure, issuing commands and stealing the spotlight at the office. Fast forward to their golden years, and suddenly they become highly dependent and practically helpless. The gap between Daddy and Mummy narrows, and upon closer inspection, you’ll notice that many dads have traded their most valuable assets: time and independence. It’s not a wise investment.
In their later years, the gap between Daddy and Mummy disappears. Some moms seek revenge by embarking on extended “omugos” (grandchild duty). Even if the husband and wife have good chemistry and join in the omugo activities, the men contribute little. They can’t cook, can’t sweep, can’t serve. They become oversized babies, still cared for by their equally elderly wives. Really?
Dear man, it’s time to unleash your inner superhero and start being useful. Learn to cook, engage in meaningful conversations, play, be available, and don’t assume having money to spend on yourself is sufficient. I understand that men who love their wives often express it through financial means, but dear friend, not all love can be shown with money. In situations where money is not the differentiator, service becomes crucial.
If you don’t get it, please bookmark this. You can’t afford to forget this one. It’s time to level up your skills, gentlemen!
Here’s to becoming the superhero your family never knew they needed!
Sincerely,
Adeolu Akinyemi
