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Identity

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“Who do men say that I am?” – Jesus Christ

That question was asked over 2000 years ago, and the answer still sounds as confusing as it did back then. The disciples of Jesus had many answers to that question, and interestingly, so does the world today. Different world religions and even Christian sects view Jesus differently. Some see him as a prophet, some as a guru and some as the Son of God. I have always thought that the true test of identity is alignment in the opinions of all who watch, but that is wrong. It’s not the views of those that watch that counts, it’s the core theme or purpose for which that individual lives. Identity is not crafted from the outward activities, it’s developed for the inward values and underlying life themes.

Many on the quest of creating a unique identity, have converted themselves into zombies. You were not designed to be one thing to everybody. Your identity is not what they call you, they’ll call you many things, it is not the job you are doing, you’ll leave it one day, it’s not your clothes or your haircut, all these are subject to change. You true identity is the core and fundamental reason why you do everything else that you do, it’s your theme, your compass.

People will relate with you at different levels, some will relate with you based on your past – is he/she not the carpenters son or daughter, some based on what they can see  – he’s blaspheming, and yet some based on a revelation of your life’s underlying theme. It’s your responsibility to understand your true identity, like my friend says, when you know this, you don’t owe anybody an explanation, you owe them manifestation. Don’t allow anybody to cage2 you into an activity driven definition (I am an accountant, I work with Enron, I am a brother to 2Face e.t.c.), you are bigger than that. You can do anything you want and truly enjoy to do, you can be yourself, if your underlying theme has excellence in it’s mix, you’ll end up well.

My mother said to me, “If you become a soldier, you’ll be a general; if you become a monk, you’ll end up as the Pope.” Instead, I became a painter and wound up as Picasso.” -Pablo Picasso

I remember one of the early day apostles saying he wanted to be all things to all men, so that he can by all means save some. Your identity will be perceived differently by different people, your underlying purpose must be clear to you. After Jesus asked the question above, he want further to ask his close friends, “who do you say that I am?” The perspective of the people who are close to you, matters more than the voice of the distant majorities. I remember when I was exiting from university education, I asked my friends a similar question, “what do you think I’m good at?” The response of your friends shouldn’t be the basis of setting your compass, but they can help you confirm it.

Don’t let the world box you into one boring role based on their assertions about your identity. Feel free to follow your passions, live your values, express your principles and fulfill your dreams. I left university as one of the top students in Electronics and Electrical Engineering, when I announced that I would not practice Engineering but rather go for what would help me participate in developing people – HR, people thought I was a sellout. I had friends who called me to ask why I was wasting so much engineering talent on a mundane social sciences career. I ventured all the same, and won international awards for system innovation, international recognition as top 2% in the field and national awards for young professional of the year 2006. I remember what my Dad told me when I told him of my decision to channel my engineering strengths towards people development. I quote, ” Deolu, helping people has brought you this far, and I have no doubts it will take you further, go for it”. That’s my underlying theme, helping people succeed.

   “All the world is a stage,
And all the men and women merely players.
They have their exits and entrances;
Each man in his time plays many parts.”

William Shakespeare

The list of what people say about you, like they do about me, may be long.  You can find an exhaustive list of perspectives about me, by just going to www.google.com and searching for either of Adeolu Akinyemi, Deolu Akinyemi or deoluakinyemi.com. Like me, you need to find your mission/theme, and give it undying commitment.

In closing let me wrap this up with something I learnt yesterday

If your target is popularity, your identity will become a mirror, reflecting whatever needs to be reflected to gain the applause of the majority and acceptance, you’ll be everyone, and no one.

If your target is pleasure, your identity becomes that of a carnival thrill seeker, alive only in bright lights around green and brown bottles, wild rides and titillating entertainment. With lustful fever, you’ll race from one ride to another, satisfying insatiable passions for sensations only long enough to look for another.

If your target is power, your identity becomes that of a wolf,  prowling, hunting and stalking the elusive game. Recognition becomes your key prey, and people your prize. Your quest becomes endless and as a result you become to an animal, an insatiable scavenger, controlled not by will from withing, but by luring from without.

The end result to seeking any of these three is the same, painful unfulfillment.  Only in seeking ones maker does a man truly become a man. For in seeing his creator man catches a glimpse of what he was intended to be. He who would see his God would then see the reason for death and the purpose of time. Destiny? Tomorrow? Truth? All are questions within the reach of the man/woman who knows his/her source. (Culled from God Came Near by Max Lucado)

Adeolu Akinyemi

Adeolu Akinyemi

22 thoughts on “Identity”

  1. Niyi Ajayi
    September 3, 2007 at 10:25 am

    Very insightful and precise.I beleive for a meaningful and purposeful living, discovery of one’s identity is very central. It will save one from a lot of time wasting activities and ventures.

    Reply
  2. Refinedone
    September 3, 2007 at 12:47 pm

    I have to agree with Niyi and say this has to be one of the most insightful post I have read from you Deolu…maybe cos it was sooo close to home for me 🙂
    … my “New Year “ starts in Step. It is when I seek Gods face for my word for the following year…last year (07) was “No Limits and expanding boundaries” ( it sure has been just that and more) So far what keeps coming up from God has been “Identity” He has been asking me …Who do I say you are? not what they say you are or should be…Not to change to make others happy or to fit in ….Just be you!

    I could say more …guess you’ll be getting a mail from me with more details 🙂

    Thanks anyway for being used as another vessel to confirm my word for (08)

    Keep being you!

    Reply
  3. mee
    September 3, 2007 at 10:41 pm

    What is a costly life mistake? how does one place a value on their life? peers, acheivement, status…percieved importance.

    In all truthfullness I had struggled with this. I had a lot to acheive as a child but with age my priorities seemed to change from season to season. Does that make me unfocused? no i would not like to think so.

    Like Deolu i changed my focus from fashion design to cosmetical chemistry, economics to HR now to venture capitalist, yet I think its my passion for creative art has fueled my desire to create something out of nothing. So even when things are going well, I can change focus and pick on some new project because I like to create but not neccessarily nuture. Lacking focus not a chance. I have not been given a lot of choice in the matter of my existence. I was born a free spirit.

    I will write my rags to riches story, my overcoming trials to triumph, but my measure of achievement has not all been money but that I finished what I set out to create and my staying power…? the Grace that was given only from above, by my God. so what then is my value? have you not heard that the dead cannot praise the Lord.

    Remember that value is the price that anyone is willing to pay for something and the Lord chose to pay for my life with his life.

    Therefore i am priceless and put strategically on this earth for a purpose. I will achieve that purpose whether i be a maid or a manager.

    My advice: Remember the Lord your God in the days of your youth. Go for life and Live, take your time and find your niche, God paid the price you need to buy the time you need.

    mee

    Reply
  4. tayo akanni
    September 3, 2007 at 11:43 pm

    gud write up man….
    quite surprised that there werent as much responses as u had from ur previous write up on MLM…..
    wonder why? mistaken identity….
    many folks tie their identity to material wealth and are much more attracted to anything that speaks of it!!!

    what u wrote about is life and it will live after u (as it does after Jesus)

    as i told my chic days ago, “if u leave skul without a clear definition of what u were sent to do in this world, what and who u are to serve for the remaining years of ur lyf…… then ur certificate is worthless”
    pls keep up the gud work…..

    I got my identity in Christ, He made the mark and i found Him the most practical influence yet to live on this terrestial globe….

    Abeg folks…. its ur daily walk with HIM matters most, keep at it, yearn for it and treasure it!!!

    Reply
  5. Okungbowa
    September 4, 2007 at 7:16 am

    Since i came to be a part of this things which u have made into a wonderful life refreashing thing it has always brought me to the right piont and helped in making so many chioce which i am very grateful.

    i still remeber the one of the articals which u said the u can say the key to failure which is pleasing everbody and forgetting urself which we all should alway think about as we have lost focus as to were and wat we want, look at me before i got this job inthe bank i and a made out plan of wat i was to do with the time limit i set for myself,but at a piont i lost it and have been trying to get back for sum time now,but thanks to a friend which GOD used to let me no wat it is i had planed for myself and to you with u uplifting tonic it is well with me.

    I no wat i want and just how to get it,GOD has always be true to me as he has never given me sumtin dat i did not ask or failed to answer my needs,he has put me were i am today and for that he will always be my all,and u too have been a source of support as God has used u to touch so many life without u knowing for that thanks man,and like i will say keep doing wat u are doing. we will meet one day and do sumtin togther.

    all the best

    Reply
  6. Freelance
    September 4, 2007 at 7:59 am

    Very Insightful and timely message. Our True Identify can only be revealed with our Creator.

    It’s just a pity most people go through life without a clear identify of who they are.

    May God give us the grace to be able to live a purpose driven life.

    Stay Blessesd

    Reply
  7. Tunne
    September 4, 2007 at 10:44 am

    hmmm……WORD!

    Reply
  8. www.babaolowo.blogspot.com
    September 4, 2007 at 3:04 pm

    It really great to have someone like you around..
    keep the good work..the heaven is your limit

    Reply
  9. Peter Oluokun
    September 4, 2007 at 5:00 pm

    Nice write up Adeolu, thanks for this once again, it is insightful, deep and refreshing, I am blessed. This article is like an energy tonic to my heart, more light and courage i have drawn from it to keep keeping on in the grace of God, pursuing God given purpose and destiny for my life in the spirit of no compromise, not giving room to any digression or distraction, living for His Glory alone.
    It is very important for us all to discover our purpose and true identity on this earth which can only be gotten from the one who created us, then we must accordingly so as please our creator, GOD HELP US ALL!!!!!

    Reply
  10. felix
    September 4, 2007 at 8:10 pm

    @deolu … I was going to talk to you yesterday about this identity issue… i’d have thot this piece was written to answer my questions, if we did talk… well i guess the word is getting to me at my point of need.
    Thanks mate… and keep up the great work!

    @all being yourself is like flying in the big blue skies, being who people want you to be in like being in a cage… i guess the choice is,… as D would say In Your Hands!

    Reply
  11. Ebenezer
    September 4, 2007 at 11:18 pm

    Deolu,

    This is what you are suppose to call RECHARGED,you have recharged guys,its a wake up call from slumber and re awakening from a life without focus,without mission and vision .

    God will water you the more.

    Reply
  12. Okungbowa
    September 5, 2007 at 6:18 am

    i quite agree with u Ebenezer it shud be called RECHARGED,bcus dats wat it has done, jst like sumone said it was jst wat i needed to get me on the path.

    u r blessed

    Reply
  13. Bukunmiomidiran
    September 5, 2007 at 3:29 pm

    I really appreciate ur depth, deolu.

    This is really hot……. you always re-inforce life’s principles…..

    Reply
  14. Gbenguz
    September 6, 2007 at 11:10 pm

    DESPITE JESUS ASKING WHOM PEOPLE THOUGHT HE WAS ,JESUS WAS NEVER IN DOUBT AS TO WHOM HE WAS .HE ONLY WANTED PEOPLES PERSPECTIVES.
    JESUS SAID “I HAVE COME SO THAT YOU MIGHT HAVE LIFE ,AND HAVE LIFE A-B-U-N-D-A-N-T-L-Y”
    WHEN WE GIVE OUR LIVES TO CHRIST IN SPITE OF OUR INPERFECTIONS WE ENJOY ABUNDANCE !
    JESUS STUDIED ENGINEERING WHICH WAS CARPENTRY OF THOSE DAYS.CARPENTRY COMES CLOSEST TO ENGINEERING.I SHOULD KNOW BECAUSE I HAVE PRACTICED CARPENTRY FOR THE LAST 20 YEARS.
    DEOLU CANT YOU SEE THE REFLECTION OF CHRIST IN YOU?
    JESUS SAID “I MUST DO THE WORK OF HE THAT SENT ME”
    DEOLU CANT YOU SEE YOU A MISSIONARY FOR GOD HELPING PEOPLE WITH GOOD NEWS?WHERE PEOPLE HOARD GOOD INFORMATION YOU SPREAD IT LIBERALLY.
    MAY THE LORD REWARD YOUR LABOUR OF LOVE.
    I LOVE YOU WITH THE LOVE OF THE LORD.

    Reply
  15. Adeolu Akinyemi
    September 7, 2007 at 9:53 am

    @All

    Thanks, I’m happy you found this useful. Always my hope, that someone will find what he/she needs just in time.

    @ Gbenguz,

    thanks too.

    Writing in capitals denotes shouting … e-ethics, can you disable your capslock, please?

    Thanks

    Reply
  16. Gbenguz
    September 7, 2007 at 8:40 pm

    Dear Chair,
    Thanks for the correction.In fact I I laughed when I saw your comment that writing in in CAPS connotes shouting.I never realized that. I thought it was a way out for a forty-something year old man to avoid switching from upper case to lower case!
    The day is wasted when I dont learn something new.Thanks indeed for todays lesson.Though I lose some time writing like this I guess I will improve and get used to it.BIG THANKS

    Reply
  17. Omooba
    September 8, 2007 at 6:40 am

    This thing is as deep as they come. Chairman, u have lifted the scales off our eyes again and gone down deep to bring up out the riches stored deep down.

    Thanks Man.

    Reply
  18. oghenetega-phillips
    March 5, 2008 at 10:25 am

    Adeolu, i just hope i’ll be able to make everyone in the world visit your websites.It’s what i call mind stretching, inspiring and challenging.
    you’ll never decrease in altitude. God bless you

    Reply
  19. tosin fayokun
    February 23, 2009 at 3:08 pm

    hmmm…. the quest for identity. i think this if not the most important is certainly one of the most important questions in life we must answer. let me refer back to the scripture that deolu quoted. notice that the correct answer to that identity question came revelation of God’s word. as deolu said, only when we get back to our creator can we truly know why we are. from various encounters i saw in the bible about how men discovered themselves, i noticed that their true identities were uncovered when they encountered a word from God about themselves.
    1.) Abram —–father of many nations .Gen12
    2.) Gideon —– mighty man of valour Judges 6
    3.) John the baptist—- the forerunner
    4.) Jehu e.t.c

    it seems for all these men, their lives took a dramatic turn when they had a word from God their maker. i think the key here is that we need God to truly know ourselves. i like the way stephen Covey puts in “the 8th habit” that

    “when u know ur talents, understand ur passions, look for a cause for which they can be deployed and u sense the urge from ur conscience within to go ahead, then u’ve found ur voice in life”

    even these men know the place of guidance thru the inner voice. don’t u think that is God speaking? ciao!

    Reply
  20. Ifects
    April 3, 2009 at 6:09 pm

    This is deep and mind-stretching.
    No one knows a thing more than its creator. Our true identity can only be found in God (our creator). What has He created you for? Why are you part of that family, business, church? Why has He planted you in this part of the world? Go ask Him !

    Reply
  21. omozele
    April 14, 2009 at 2:18 pm

    identity is vital. i believe it is the very essence of our living.many people suffer from identity crisis. letting other define who they are, not knowing who they are and so will ultimately cage what they can do!that was why Jesus had to ask his disciples what the peple thought he was and when he got the feedback, he had to ask them because they were closer to him. if the issue want important, he would not have asked.

    May God help us discover who we are and when we are being asked to give a kind of answer God would be proud of .God bless Naija.

    Reply
  22. Kilanko Oluwaseun
    April 23, 2009 at 9:46 pm

    Insightful! We are who we think we are, not what pple think we are!

    Reply

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Many hold their audience spell bound with motivational speeches but few care to hold the audience by the hand and help them walk their way to financial freedom like he does. Many have failed at everything they have tried to do but everything he does turns to gold. Read more…

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